Hand Practices

Magnum Dopus

by Hand Practices

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1.	Prelude (To Ted Nugent Is A Pussy) 03:28	lyrics
Ted Nugent is a pussy Ted Nugent is a pussy Ted Nugent is a pussy This will only sound good if you’re high This will only sound good if you’re high This will only sound good if you’re high This will only sound good
2.	Ted Nugent Is A Pussy 03:28	lyrics
Are you ready to fucking rock? Go over the top and stop at nothing to cheer us on Are we cut from the same cloth? Yes we are! Do you have an opinion? If it’s different from the mainstream yell, “Fuck yeah!” Tell the man to fuck off Why bother? Are you sick of the same song playing over and over again inside your head How do you turn it off? You can’t turn it off! You’re so incredibly someone But you wish like hell you were somebody else instead At least you’re nobody’s pet Why bother?
3.	Wishing You Were Anywhere But Here 07:28	lyrics
Wake up, boy, you’ve been asleep for days Don’t you know your life’s a passing phase? One day you’ll look back and see it clear Wishing you were anywhere but here Wake up, boy, you’ve been asleep for days The world spins on without you anyways And so do all the ones who you hold dear Wishing you were anywhere but here Wishing you were anywhere but here Maybe this was all just a dream And everything is the way it should be Nothing’s ever quite what it seems And nobody cares about what it all means I know you can feel it, but you can’t explain It’s like everyone else is just playing a game But everyone else probably feels the same Wandering aimless Lost and alone, with no place to go Just tired of wandering aimless Praying for death with every breath Yeah, maybe this was all just a dream And everything is the way it should be Or maybe not Wake up, boy, you’ve been asleep for days I keep running circles in my head Spiraling around until a sound comes out again Until my voice is loud again Echoes are the only noises left Bouncing off the walls as if they’re wont to wake the dead Shake these demons from their beds It’s so good to see you, tell me how you’ve been This feels so familiar, but I don’t remember when I’d better be going; something feels wrong We are singing different words, and none of them belong And all the things I should’ve done instead Waiting on the wayside for this lunacy to end But this shit don’t ever end No, this shit won’t ever end No, this shit won’t ever end Maybe this was all a mistake And nobody cares how much shit you can take Keep pleasant thoughts that the world will change Of music, of laughter, of all still unfrayed Yeah keep pleasant thoughts, it’ll all wash away To a perfect blankness Where we can’t come back That’s all that I ask Yeah, maybe this was all a mistake But somebody’s coming to set things straight
4.	Message From A Disembodied Voice 02:52	lyrics
I can’t be bothered by the whimsy of the weather as it changes And to be quite honest, I don’t want to hear my thoughts reiterated anyway I just want to find some peace today, but something’s always on my mind I can’t think clearly, I can’t focus on the present as it passes I’m here but barely, I don’t care about what happens to be happening to me I miss you dearly, but I feel we’re disappearing, cause there’s nothing in the mirror but reflections of a dream I just want to find some peace today, but something’s always on my mind Oh, I just want to find some peace today. Watch pretty clouds drift right on by
5.	A Meditation On Apathy 04:17	lyrics
It’s only music in the background It won’t drown out all your thoughts Worry not, one day you’ll die and they’ll all be gone It doesn’t really even matter And no one ever really cares Just pretend like we’re not here Your prayers for silence have been answered Be careful what you’re wishing for If you ever get it all, you’ll still want more It doesn’t really even matter When noise is all that you can hear The message cuts through crystal clear I can see you standing there all waiting for the end I promise that it’s coming soon, my friends The Earth once ‘round its axis and once more round again Give or take some meaningless percent The curtain falls. Applaud! Applaud! And gather at the doors I’ll meet you outside for cigarettes I won’t be long, but if you’re gone, let’s get together soon There must be better things we’ve ought to do It doesn’t really even matter So let it all just disappear
6.	Wishing It Was Any Time But Now 03:07	lyrics
Hello, weary traveler, your journey’s almost over It’s time to do it all again Every iteration sounds the same as you grow older And no one else is listening But it gets harder to let go When it’s the only thing you know Hello, aimless wanderer, the end is growing nearer And you don’t even seem to care You don’t have any answers, but the questions become clearer When no one is around to hear It’s getting harder to hold on You had a reason, but it’s gone Goodbye, strange philosopher, may you complete your journey Maybe it’ll lead you home
7.	Theme (From Recurring Nightmare) 08:26	lyrics
Spinning ‘round the universe in search of finding somewhere you belong But you’re so small and weak you move in place or don’t move anywhere at all Run around in circles as you please You’ve reached the end, now it’s gonna repeat Are you still contagious? Are you still in some outrageous state of mind? Walking through the darkness, all you had to do was open up your eyes You’ll never have the answers that you seek You’ll never figure out what it don’t mean You’re just looking at the sky through the trees I laid down on the ground and went to sleep And had the very most peculiar dream The corpses stretched from sea to shining sea And all of the destruction came from me And centuries and centuries abound Each moment undisturbed by wretched sound Nor dust, nor chaos, nor philosophy Alas, that’s not how things turned out to be You wake up feeling rotten, you’ve forgotten all the beauty that you saw You wait for time to pass, and time will pass until there isn’t time at all It ends the same as any other day, and I’m afraid I might know why Even though you think you don’t you know, already, how it feels to die You’re looking hard, but you won’t ever see No truth you find will ever set you free You’re just looking at the sky through the trees You’re still looking at the sky through the trees
8.	Existential Bullshit 04:48	lyrics
I don’t want to write another tune About how there ain’t shit to do How everything has got me down Or all my time is running out I don’t want to write one about you I don’t want to sing another song Where all the words just come out wrong I don’t have nothing left to say You never listen anyway I don’t want to keep on keeping on It’s Existential bullshit Existential bullshit I don’t want to play another note I don’t want to have another smoke I just need to get some sleep But peace of mind don’t come too cheap I don’t want to have to learn to cope with Existential bullshit Existential bullshit Existential bullshit (It’s existential, baby Oh yeah)
9.	I Loved Rugs 06:02	lyrics
These are just feelings, you’ve felt them before Whipping around in your head Flashing and fleeting like flicks from my cigarette Bending and breathing, inert or ignored Flowering under your skin These are just feelings, you don’t have to let any in I promise I won’t ever hurt you Unless you try and hurt me first No one else is ever gonna love you as much as I do No one else is ever gonna get you as fuckin’ high (yeah, yeah) No one else is ever gonna love you as much as I love drugs I love drugs These are just feelings, you need them again Quickly, before you forget Crashing and fading, inflating unpayable debts These are just feelings, you need them some more It’s time to cash in your checks Sooner or later the reaper will come and collect You have my word that I’ll protect you And I won’t question what you’re worth Oh, no one else is ever gonna love you as much as I do No one else is ever gonna get you as fuckin’ high (yeah, yeah) (yup) No one else is ever gonna love you as much as I love drugs I love drugs LOL No one else is ever gonna love you as much as I love drugs I love drugs (That was the best one, I thought)

about

This album is free to download

credits

released August 4, 2020

Joshua Kalvelage - Guitar/Vocals/Handclaps/Lyrics
Robbie Bourne - Bass/Vocals/Percussion/Handclaps
Patrick Betzold - Guitar
Max Crowe - Drums/Percussion/Synth/Guitar/Vocals/Handclaps
Matt Crowe - Synth
Amber Waters - Handclaps

Engineered by Max Crowe
Mastered by Todd Rittmann

Album Cover Art By Patrick Horvath
Inside Cover Art By Kate Bourne